Friday, July 28, 2006
My baby rabbits are doing real fine. all of them have got a thin layer of white fur so they're no longer so pinky and skinhead. here're the pic for the past few days:
thanks to all the great pple who've given me brilliant ideas at the www.pets.com.sg forum -- i've sort of forced the mother to feed the kids by putting her into a small cage, big enough for her to turn her body, but not enough space for her to jump around. it's a wonder how the little ones know where to get their mama's milk! they will just crawl underneath the mother and startdrinking, and i can only see their legs kicking around and sometimes the smaller one will get kicked out. no worries though, cos she'll get back to drink more milk later. the scratched little one has its cut healed and is doing just as fine.
it's such a relief to see the little ones having bloated stomach after each drinking session, and they will be lying on their back kicking their legs but not being able to get back to their usual position. their eyes are not yet open. they're soooo cute.. :)
i hope i dun get too attached to them and dun bear to part with them by the time they're fully grown up. i can't possibly keep them with me, all 5! like my family with 5 members haha..
| posted by clouds at 9:48 AM
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
After nursing the 2 pinkies for awhile, i decided to change the bedding for the rabbit, then i saw another pinkie!!! behind the cage.. it's soooo small, but still moving! i thot it would've died without food or shelter for more than 15 hours, but is managed to survive. so aft that, i tried to look out for anymore babies -- luckily none left outside.
total head count 3 pinkies! the last one was really small, but i'm sure it's stronger than the rest, since it survived thru the ordeal..
i'm so scared that the mother rabbit will bite them to death, must be due to me touch them too much, so they reek of human smell? so the mother doesn't attempt to feed them which poor me haf to do the job. i used a really tiny dropper and put drops of fresh milk into the mouths of the babies. time-consuming, but bo bian, since the mother doesn't want them.. she even attempted to bite one of its tiny arms off!! scary sia.. and the mother like blind one leh, she stepped one the little ones a lot of times! haiz.. poor babies..
| posted by clouds at 10:25 PM
in case u havent gotten the news, im now the official proud owner of ...
2 new baby rabbits!!
it came as a shock for me too. last nite, when i was about to sleep at midnight, i peeked into the rabbits' cage and found 2 tiny, wriggly, pinky, baby rabbitthey're so small u can hold them in your palm. and they're so cute, they stumble around blindly, cos their eyes cannot open yet.
probably it came as a shock for the mother too, cos the mother is a 1st time mother and i guess she don't know how to feed the rabbits. that's why she sits in a daze in one corner of the cage. these few days i gonna be busy feeding the little ones. poor little rabbits.. they're soo cute, but i can't keep them for long, my mum wants me to give it away since we already had much space occupied by other things.. oh well, gonna nurse them back to health then think about who to give.. :)
i'm so proud of the 2 precious ones!
| posted by clouds at 12:55 PM
Sunday, July 23, 2006
I have been complaining about people who always leave you gradually. Slowly they'll contact you less and less often until they degrade to friends who call on you only when they need help. but i feel that this kind of parting is better than the abrupt parting i experienced when i'm leaving my contract sch.
it's always hard to leave ur colleagues, whom you've been thru many ups and downs with, slogged thru various projects, bitch abt other people. so much so i think we've become frens more than just working partners.
and i thought i won't be as hard to leave ur students, but i'm wrong, it's harder to leave the students than colleagues! maybe it's becos they show their emotions so real and true to u. even the quiet ones. their tears are so real, their sorrow so near.. i tried not to cry, i tried to put on a strong front, reassured them that i'll be back. but in the end i failed to retain the tears, when this gal asked the sec 1 band members to play a song for me.. standing in front taking all in, i can't hold back my tears, when i see them cry while they play my song.
21st of july, the last day of the yr i can see the flag raising ceremony in school. 21st of july is a day of tears and well wishes.
probably this day is the day where i am made more determined to be a teacher. it showed me the returns of being a teacher, and being appreciated. and it moved me and told me that teaching is no longer just a job.
a teacher is a mother, a tutor, a motivator, a companion, a social worker.. a teacher is more!
seriously, i feel that the reson of they being so unwilling for me to leave when they said cos i treat them so well, is that i'm not strict enough, im not fierce enough. maybe i can teach, but the class too noisy to show my flair.. nvm, it's a lesson learned!
| posted by clouds at 1:17 AM
Thursday, July 20, 2006
今天我上了我在崇文中学的最后一堂课。当然，我希望还会有机会在这里教书，因为我觉得我已经得到很多回报了。
在这里的每一天，又苦也有乐。看见学生们渐渐成长，渐渐懂事，我感觉很开心。愉悦之情无法隐藏。
还记得去年的这个时候，我刚踏进这里，什么都不知，什么都不会。辛好有亲切的同事们在旁帮助，我才能渡过难熬的半年。去年我承认我的确没有什么付出，所以也没什么收获，得来的只是学生们讽刺与嘲笑。也许是我这个人比较慢热，不善于用言语表达自己，所以有想放弃的念头。身为一名教师，我不能一直这个样子啊！如果我真的想为自己和学校们的学生干点事，就不能轻易的放弃。
到了2006年，我发奋图强，希望能突破重围终于完成我当老师的梦想。虽然我有很多事情还是无法掌握，但是我努力的去尝试。虽然我的工作量在我踏入2006年时增加了不少，但是我也乐意地为我这份工作付出。由于工作真的是太多了，而且自己的能力有限，所以我只能勤能补拙，天天付出多一点时间把工作完成。也许我的付出已得到一点点回应了，学生们都在今与昨天献上了他们最亲切，最诚心诚意，的祝福。
我非常感动，也会努力前进，希望吸取更多经验好好的帮助千千万万（其实也没这么伟大啦！）的学生。 看见你们这么难过，我心也很痛。天下无不散之宴席，我想我们也应该从这次的经验学习成长。
对1E1，我非常感谢你们大家这么支持我。你们文学老师说给我听的诗句，我非常感动。你们所给我的一起，都是一份推动力。我不会忘记你们的，希望你们也会把我的话铭记在心。好好努力用功读书，别让关心你们的人失望。
谢谢你们给我的一切，能认识你们是我的福气，希望有一天我们会再相遇！
诗云上
| posted by clouds at 9:23 AM
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Including today, i still have only 3 more days left. felt a bit sad, as i see my students this morning. i wanted them to stay back for 5 min to take pictures with me, some of them complain, complain, complain, but the most touching thing is the talkative (dun pay attn to my lesson) one is making an effort to persuade everyone to stay back to take pictures. seeing this, my heart melted.
sometimes i really do hate the class for making me hoarse after every lesson, cos they make so much noise and dun wan to listen to me. for today, they were manageable and nice. i think little incidents like this motivate you. to go on even though how life can be so shitty sometimes. i makes me feel that i havent done enough for them. *sobs*
hope life will be better next week and hope that i will not miss them so much.
| posted by clouds at 10:12 AM
Sunday, July 16, 2006
一个像夏天, 一个像秋天.
i've made many friends along the way. some not with me anymore, some ex- best friends now are only
acquaintance. some gd friends i avoid. some not-so-close friends become close friends, some friend's friend become my friend. now if u want me to count who are my close friends, i'm sorry to say i only have a handful..
let's see who made an impact in my life so far (in chronological order):
- pri sch close friends i can say i got only 3 bah.. we still do keep in contact (writing letters) until jc period i think.. quite sad.. now, nobody ever sends these personal letters to me anymore.. :( i dun like seeing my letters, usually bills or some drastic news.. sometimes, i do enjoy writing letters to someone. especially since the both of our lives are totally different. she'll usually tell me abt her new bfs whereas i'll be wondering, what is a bf? hahaha..
- qiulin (sec 1 & 2 classmate) -- we kept in contact awhile aft graduating from sec sch.. wrote a couple of letters to each other, subsequently, she's the fowarded msg type liao.. but at least she's still around in my life. this is from close friends to just acquaintance.
- Eileen (sec 1 classmate) -- she was one of the 3 gals in class who chose NP as a ECA (last time called ECA), so i was quite close to her. we suffered under the hot sun, the grueling drills, the P. Ubin camp and the boring lectures. subsequently during jc or after (?) we still kept in touch once in awhile thru sms and email.subsequently, she became the forwarded msg type again..
- Es (sec 2 classmate) -- erm.. *blush* he's my bf now.. sec 2 he's my enemy (cos he's bullies ah gooong!), spilled liquid paper on me!! and calls me names. probably he's my bf so that he can make amends to me.. hee.. lost touch with him (not that i ever wanna keep in touch with an enemy u know), and met him again on friendster, then on buses to NUS, and then.. yah u know the rest of the story..
- huishan & yuzhen (sec 2-4 classmate) -- not really so close when i first got to know them. used to walk back together to the mrt station with huishan during sec sch time. but dun feel that i'm that close to her during sec sch.. jc times, sometimes will bump into either of them on bus to sch or back, same cca too.. so was especially close to yuzhen too since she's just next class to me. shared our crushes and grievances, and school work (maths homework) too.. hee.. then went to NUS, shared a few common lectures, lecturers and classmates. now, still friends, tho not as close as before, but i still do cherish wat we had before. :) work is splitting us apart now.. :(
- Sushi & gang (sec 3-4 classmates) -- in sec sch when we were in npcc, those ppl who're really so free are us! haha.. those secretaries and non- NCOs.. so we spent a lot of time eating snakes, hiding somewhere to rest. in jc, we're in same cca also, really admire her computing skills, which is why she's now still doing IT-related job! nowadays, still a talk-crap friend with sushi.. on msn especially.. hahaha.. she's a nice gal to hang out with as well.. :) recently, she sorta organised an old classmates outing.. got 7 gals from same sec 4 class together! wat a feat! and i enjoyed every moment of it. :)
- Ah ma (JC classmate) -- she's our ah ma, cos she says she's older than us, but then we still dun feel the age gap, prolly cos ah ma is young at heart (in appearance too)! aft jc, we enjoyed ourselves with swimming, shopping and ktving.. she sings real well, and is v interested in computing as well! maybe that's why she also hit off with sushi rite away! suddenly was pulled apart by misunderstandings in NUS, but we made up with eachother again.. should say that she's a close friend, tho i feel we're drifting apart again.. but, she'll still be my close friend :)
- Nit (JC classmate) -- seldom contact with each other nowadays. i never initiated any outing with her, and she too.. then both of us oso lazy and busy (or so she says).. haha.. so i can only see her if there's any jc class outing.. like such a pity, since i still feel she's really quite close to me at that 1 point in time in my life..
- CR (JC classmate) -- used to be a companion in school work, she's the benchmark, and i'm never able to complete as much as as she did.. aft jc, we did not contact much.. thru msn only lor.. see each other and catch up on each other's life during class outings..
- CTY (JC classmate) -- he's the closest guy fren i had from jc. used to chat on smses n msn. nowadays also chatted once in awhile on msn.. so glad that he got himself a sweet gf from CBLC (which i intro to him)! hee.. tho i know there're some unhappiness in CBLC
- Ling (Same JC but different class) -- she's a fren of ah ma, quite glad i had her in my aft jc life.. dinners, OT, shopping, visiting the temple, bitching about ppl, then shared 2 same modules in NUS, so effectively, she's been with me thru NUS.. all the way to now.. now, she bitches abt her sch and me abt my sch.. hee.. still meet up with her once in awhile to chit chat and eat.. we're both food lovers! haha..
- Sharon (temp job colleague) she was from my sec sch and same jc, but we were never really in the same class till in NUS when we shared some same lectures. we used to so close that we would go shopping, and share secrets.. until u grad from NUS, when i did not hear a word from u, except ur questions u posed on me, and no snippets of ur life in exchange. u are not my friend cos u were unfair to me.. u did not wan to share ur life with me yet u expect me provide u with highlights from my life?
- M & M (temp job colleagues)-- one of them is from my same jc, but i do not know them till we met for the temp job aft jc.. went on 2 overseas trip with them.. and i shd say they're my tea buddies! u know, chilling over a cuppa and chatting and bitching about guys and gals, bfs and gfs.. and i love it when they take care of me like i'm their little sis (innocent mah) tho i'm like the oldest among the 3 of us. maybe in future, we'll all be tai tais and have tea in the afternoons sharing about our husbands and children. suddenly i'm almost certain we'll be with each other for a very long time. :)
- PF(same CCA in NUS, junior) -- tho i dun see her often now that we've grad and started working, but i cherish her as a friend. she led a hard life, and i think she is still leading the hard life now, so i feel that i shd be with her since we've shared each other's hard life before, isnt it? she's my shopping-at-bugis, temple-visits buddy and swimming buddy.
- CBLC in NUS -- should say that tho i did not make many new friends there, i still love the whole environment that brightens up my life in NUS. without them, i would feel empty and without support in the whole new environment after JC.
- colleagues at CBSS -- gonna leave them soon.. and i'm abit reluctant.. my 1 yr's worth of baggage is in this school.. with them, my colleagues, we went thru joy, anger, grievances, complaints, gossips and lotsa activities! school camps, school activities, meals, ktvs, wedding dinner, slogging sessions, late nites at work.. they're really supportive and helpful.. and i'm glad to haf them with me. :) hope i can at least keep in touch with some of them.
i think on the above list, some of them are wake up calls to me! i must must must work hard to retain friendships i have now, not regret when everyone drifts apart and when it gets very very hard to get back to where we were at before. i must tell myself that i will try my best so that i will not feel remorseful, after not doing enough.. if u're mentioned, in 1 way or another, you've made an impact on me! thank u all!
| posted by clouds at 12:47 PM
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
If you have wronged someone, make amends.
If you broken something, fix it.
If you have caused harm, seek forgiveness.
But you, Yun Yun, you must stop apologizing!
For at the heart of it, you are apologizing for yourself.
And for that, you have no reason.
You should start working and stop apologizing.
Look forward to the future, not backwards at the past.
| posted by clouds at 1:27 PM
Saturday, July 08, 2006
the grumpy old woman i'm talking abt is no other one but me. all i do is complain, complain, complain! it won't do u gd if i go out with u. no wonder ppl no longer asks me out.
i will complain abt sch, i will complain abt life, i will complain abt family, i will complain abt friends. typical s'porean? i think so. but i think i'm 100 x worse, cos i'll irritate the person whom i'm complaining to. cos i go round and round and round and round abt the same topic. ppl who care a lot abt me will feel heartache for me. and will also get a headache afterwards. ppl who dun care so much abt me will prolly doze off.
i think i'm being unreasonable, but i am who i am, like it or not. i hate it myself, but i dun think i will improve by alot. yah, here i am complaining abt my complaints. typical yun-behaviour. so much so sometimes i go into deep depression, lying on my bed and cry for an hour and try to push negative thoughts out. yet, the negative thoughts grew more negative and i will cry until i sleep till the next day. the next day i'll still be reminded of these (with my swollen eyes) and then i will start to feel sorry for myself again. and then i will be depressed the whole day until i do something that takes my mind off things.
if i'm turning u ppl off, i'm sorry.. i think i'm getting a bit autistic down here. cos i dun feel like toking abt my troubles, and if i really do say them, i'll get really upset abt it that i dun feel like seeing the light and face the corner of my room. i will sob and cry until my nose becomes rummy, and i can't talk. i will hide my tears frm my family and sms my dear abt it. then he will console me, scold me and feel really frustrated abt me. i think that's my way of pushing ppl out of my life. cos i self-destruct, self-degrade, have low self-esteem and i feel like escaping.
somehow i wish there was a capsule to throw me into isolation, dun need to teply to any smses, dun need to send SOS smses. like for that moment, ppl will not remember my existence, i can clear my negative thoughts and carry on with life aft that. before this capsule is invented, let me suffer on my own. i have to learn it the hard way.
dun ask me wat i'm depressed in, cos i dun understand why am i so easily affected, dun ask me becos it will spark my negative thoughts. i will only complain and complain without making improvements. prolly u can kill me if the negative thots dun distance themselves from me.
dun worry frens, i'll be fine aft awhile. as usual, isn't it? just ignore me.
| posted by clouds at 12:54 AM
Sunday, July 02, 2006
yun yun looks like a little girl, taking photo with mickey & minnie!
M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E!!
| posted by clouds at 10:00 PM
