Thursday, November 20, 2003
watching holland v really makes me reflect on myself... the material world, Yan Yan is so horribly materialistic, and u wonder whether such a person exists in real life? of cos they do... i think there are lots! am i such a person?
yeah, have been wondering why i have been making use of this guy... sigh, i really dun wanna hitch the ride from him, but it's really tempting, u know... isn't it great u can reach sch in 30 min? and dun need to sit till ur bum hurts on the bus? yeah, that's such a selfish thought on my part, but inconveniencing someone is not good... yah, so in the end? i hitched the ride... so much for feeling bad... makes me wanna think i'm like yan yan, always using tianxiang to do things for her... how i wished i just look like her... yah, stressful exam periods... makes my face break out more... somemore everyday in the cold aircon library, makes it dry and reddish... yucks... somemore can eat then sleep and then sit down somemore in the library the whole day... makes me feel so gluttony... oops, i'm digressing, but yeah, so how? argh, i know i never get an answer anyway... i just have to make sure i dun appear too pretty and nice in front of this guy...
yah i know, been quite pissed off with myself... must focused and not think about any of this kinda things leh... haiz, but i can't help it but miss HS a bit... yeah, that ECP guy lah... i miss his cute cute smile, his boyish look, and his boyish voice... long time never see him liao, ever since that day we went to Centro, i think he must be quite put off by me clubbing habits ba? but i'm a gd gal leh, or rather i was a gd gal... hmm, u must be wondering... why do i change interest so fast? i mean like last wk i still mentioned going out with ken, now some other guy is on my mind... no lah... i must confess: i treat all guys as friends unless otherwise proven, and i must always have someone to think about to keep me motivated in studying... dumb rite? but i guess it's quite true... dun bother abt me for now, i'll pull thru and emerge a CAP 4.5 this sem if i stay like this... ha ha.. quite hard to fulfill... cos this sem really got no true CRUSH (ling, rem one yr ago? i guess i'm super crazy over bc loh...) think my grades gonna suffer this sem... stupid excuse not to get good grades huh? dun care..
i've suffered 2 demoralising papers... 3 more to go... i'll press on! Ling, me just received ur sms... thanks gal, looking forward to meeting up with u during the holidays... dun care how u look, cos i'm not too glam myself nowadays...:)